xxSometimeSxx

2006-02-08T03:28:00.000-08:00

i'm moving..
yourstruly-me.blogspot.com
see ya there.. remember to change your link.. :)

2006-01-06T19:33:00.000-08:00

orientation is over.. the nightmare is over..
it was tiring, but lots of fun..
hoped the jc1s did enjoy their 4 days of orientation..
o-night was so enjoyable, but filled with screaming..
my ears almost went deaf..
well, next event will be taken by the interns..
and it's time for me to start studying for all the topical tests..

2005-12-29T08:12:00.000-08:00

this blog is going to be stagnant soon, or rather, it's already stagnant..
busy with council, studies and everything else..
no time for blogging anymore..

2005-12-21T23:17:00.000-08:00

back from my trip to europe..
interesting..
i'm still following the time there, so i can't get to sleep even late at night..
well, europe was nice.. the branded goods there were cheap.. at least cheaper than singapore..
but then, it's still quite far beyond my reach.. hahas..
let's see.. the food there is nice.. but the chinese meals were sucky..
the things there were really expensive though.. can cost up to S$25 for a plate of pasta..
fell sick half way through the holiday.. terrible sore throat and cough..
still coughing until now..
anyway, back to the point of europe..
the toilets were really clean, but the streets are really really really dirty..
unlike singapore..
and the people were really rude.. especially the french..
obnoxious pigs.. argh..
well i'm glad to be back in singapore.. and i think i love singapore even more now.. hahas..
comparing the US to europe.. i prefer the US.. hahas..
hope i can go back there soon to meet steph.. i miss her so much..
:)

free internet

2005-12-05T08:16:00.000-08:00

haha.. now i'm at the airport using the free internet..
not used to the keyboard.. prefer mine at home.
apparantly, there isn't anything much on the internet..
don't know how steph can play until she missed her flight..
hahas..
oh well.. here i come europe!!
see ya guys in two weeks.. tata!!

leaving singapore..

2005-12-04T20:27:00.001-08:00

i'm leaving singapore in about 8 hours.. hahas..
airport here i come!!
or rather, europe..
but anyways, i don't want time to past so fast actually..
a blink of an eye, and it's already december..
before i know it, i'll be back, and then it will be my BIRTHDAY, and then christmas, and then the new year..
and all of us would have to start mugging again for A's..
i don't want time to past so fast..
i haven't done any work for the past month..
it has really been a holiday for me.. crap..
i seem to have forgetten everything i've learnt..
oh no..
argh..
but for now, i shall just enjoy my holiday!! yups!!
tata!! see ya all when i come back..
cheers.. :)

2005-11-30T02:15:00.000-08:00

prom.. in two days..
orientation.. in one month..
till then, it's scoldings scoldings and more scoldings.
i love my life.. :)

2005-11-20T01:39:00.000-08:00

why am i so greedy? really..
i don't think anyone in the world is as greedy as me.
i wanted it so much, i got it in the end.
now that i'm not happy, i don't want it anymore..
why am i never contented?
there's so many things in life for me to choose, and i had to pick the worst choice.
moreover, i'm regreting it.
it's a blessing in disguise for the six of them who did not get in. really.

i feel like i'm so restrained.
i can't do this, can't do that.
afraid of the consequences after doing the wrong things, when it isn't actually wrong at all.
or rather, it isn't actually wrong to me at all.
how come some people have to be so demanding? why must everything be what that person had in mind?
don't we have a little authority at all? not a little tinny weeny bit at all?
aren't we suppose to be on the same level as teachers?
aren't we suppose to speak for the student population?
aren't we doing our best to serve the school already?
it's a service, not a burden.
everything is turning into a burden nowadays.
a huge burden that i don't want to carry anymore.
i think many others wouldn't want to carry it too.
A BURDEN!! who would be so stupid to choose to carry a burden?
me i suppose. i'm so stupid.

argh.. if you don't know what i'm talking about, it's council. quite obvious isn't it?

2005-11-18T06:10:00.000-08:00

be sorted @ nimbo.net

2005-11-16T06:08:00.000-08:00

today stayed at home, but didn't touch my homework..
cleared my clothes..
realise that i really grew very FAT.. can't fit into so many clothes.. haiz..
end up throwing one big bag, ok.. not throwing.. giving to people i think..
well.. as they say, everyone grows..
tomorrow going for the 2015 prize presentation..
cross my fingers and hope for the best..
everything will turn out fine.. and splendid..
haha.. going to sleep already, have to wake up early tomorrow..
tata!!

2005-11-06T23:56:00.000-08:00

in less than 24 hours time, it's going to be my group's PW presentation.
PW.. project work..
everything is going to end by tomorrow..
it's not like a hate PW, but i think i'm going to miss the times..
when we aren't rushing out our drafts and presentation anymore.
when we sidetrack during meetings
when we had fun goossiping about others.
when we got together for meetings and dicussed about the most farfectched ideas we have.
when we went out together and did the surveys at Orchard.
when we covered for one another.
actually, i think i'm going to miss everything about PW when it's gone.
i love my PW group..
it's been fun having all of you around..
hope next year, when we get our PW results, we will really get the grade we deserve..

2005-11-06T02:27:00.000-08:00

didn't go to church today..
sick.. headache, fever, sore throat..
went to see the doctor, got some antibiotics..
going back to bed soon..
hope i will recover by tuesday..
don't want to faint in front of the examiners..

back to lala land.

2005-11-03T05:50:00.000-08:00

went out with calista yesterday.
didn't have the energy to blog. or rather didn't have to time.
came home and joined my mother in her korean movie marathon.
anyway, about yesterday.
met cal at 1 plus.. went to town.
took neoprints, which i haven't taken for a long long time.
bought my flip flops.
search of cal's bag, which was out of stock.
i hope it comes soon, then maybe we can go out and get her bag again. hahas.
went back to tampines since we didn't have anything to do in town.
so we were at tampines, and i met rong teng. hahas.
fate.. that's what cal said..
well, it's what i thought too..
how come whenever i go out with my friends and rong teng's friends happen to be there, his friends will ask for my friend's status. cute isn't it?
but well, cal's taken..
at least i hope she will be soon. hahas.
don't understand why they aren't together yet. oh well, everything is destined.
if they are meant to be together, they will be.
hahas.
shall end here..
hope everyone in the entire world finds their 'one'. hahas.

2005-10-31T04:38:00.000-08:00

if you're wondering where the link *dar dar* went to, which i doubt anyone realise anyway because hardly anyone reads my blog, i deleted it.
he erased his blog already.
isn't that sad?
the whole entire blog, not just an entry, the whole entire blog, gone with the wind.
oh well..

today had chinese ao level exam. didn't study much, expected this kind of consequence.
crapped my way through sectuon A, don't even know if it is relevant to the topic.
i only knew two words in section B.
answers for section C and D all different from grace, which means there is a high chance that it is wrong.
section E, couldn't match up the words.
section F and G, haha. expected it to be easy, which obviously turned out oppositely.
how interesting right?

shopped today to relieve depression. i may have to retake the exam afterall next june. hmm..
bought a skirt and a t-shirt.
i saw another blouse which i rather liked. but, it's expensive. we'll see how it goes. if it's still there when i return on the next visit, then maybe it's fated for me to buy it.
afterall, everything depends on fate. hahas.

now, it's PW full swing, although i just feel like slacking around doing nothing. although i think it's not going to ask. have to start preparing for next year. buck up and gain some pace, or else, i'll forever be left out in the class.. which i will not allow myself to.
that's what i say anyway, whether i can do it is another thing. hahas.

2005-10-28T07:24:00.001-07:00

got this from carlene's blog.. it's been long since i read her blog..

7 things that scare me:
1) losing him
2) losing my parents (i suppose)
3) getting bad grades
4) not getting into a uni course i like
5) not getting married
6) going overweight
7) my thoughts?? (i think i'm rather evil)

7 things that i like most: (things ar? cannot people? can i just assume people are included?)
1) him
2) friends
3) family
4) good grades
5) shoes
6) my toy doggie
7) volleyball (sudden interest.. although cannot play well)

7 important things in my room:
1) my radio
2) my toilet
3) clothes
4) my handphone charger (without it, my battery would be flat.. and then i wouldn't have a phone to use )
5) my toy doggie
6) air-con
7) my calendar

7 random facts about me:
1) i'm attached.. (my parents don't know it though)
2) i cry easily
3) i long to have a family of my own
4) i'm very loud at times (ok, most of the time)
5) my thoughts are rather mean and evil
6) i have goldfish memory
7) my brain has a working speed like a pentium II computer (slow, in other words)

7 things i plan to do before i die:
1) to have a happy family
2) be more active in church
3) master a game (anything will do, can't expect much from a sports idiot)
4) at least have some working experience
5) learn a musical instrument
6) stop telling lies
7) learn to be more considerate towards other people

7 things i can do:
1) lie
2) be mean
3) sleep
4) love someone wholeheartly (who can't?)
5) sa jiao (but not really successful ba?)
6) screw up my exams
7) watch tv non-stop (i mean those vcd series)

7 things i cant do:
1) control my temper
2) serve a volleyball
3) not gossip
4) tolerate nonsense from people
5) be satisfied by my results
6) master chinese
7) see the person i like suffering

7 things i say most:
1) i'm pentium II leh
2) huh?
3) what?
4) oh ok
5) anything lor
6) up to u lar
7) haha

7 celebrity crushes: (i suppose it means the people i admire?)
1) Lin Jun Jie
2) Hong Jun Yang
3) Kelly Poon
4) Stephanie Sun
5) Liang Jing Ru
6) Zhou Yu Ming
7) Liu De Hua

7 people who have to do this:
1) who else but him? (but i don't think he will read this anyways)
2) anyone reading it now.
3) my classmates
4-7) basically everyone

that's about me.. hahas..

2005-10-25T05:03:00.000-07:00

life has been really monotonous these few days.
the school year is coming to an end. and there's really little motivation to go to school each and everyday.
moreover, we still have to complete tutorials and attend lectures.
i thin tpjc should revise their post-promos activities. it's just naturally for people to not have the mood for lessons after promos.

chinese is approaching. and i'm not doing anything.
i just want a B. not asking for much.

can't wait for after chinese and pw. that's when our school holidays really start.
but then again, how long can that last. in another two months, we'll be back in school.
starting the new year, with new people around in school.
starting to mug for a levels.
suddenly, we become the seniors in the school.
time really flies, doesn't it?

2005-10-21T07:11:00.000-07:00

To anyone who lives in hatred:

"To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless."

So have faith and hope that we'll be able to forgive whatever torment that people has put us through, and learn to love one another like what God would want us to.

the unfair world.

2005-10-21T06:25:00.000-07:00

the world.. seems to be never fair.
so many things are not within our control.
but we humans, assume that we are so smart and intelligent.
in the end, when things do not turn out in the way we want it to, we blame it one everyone but ourselves.

i pray, i hope, i ask..
and then, when i got it,i realised it's not worth it at all.
i did so much for that person, but she doesn't change at all.
looking at her, i felt more heartbroken then ever.
so i started asking myself, why one the first place did i bother to pray for her?
why can't she change and reflect on what's she doing to herself?
and then, i start wondering again, maybe it's just in her to be like that.
nothing, nothing can change her anymore.
so then, i gave up hope and move on with my own life.
once in a while, stopping to check if she's alright.
but then she doesn't give a damn.
so, i learnt your lesson.
mind my own business..

friends..

2005-10-14T07:55:00.000-07:00

don't really know what to write.
my life has been rather meaningless and boring.
i hope that it will seriously change when i leave jc.
oh well.

went with nadia to meet karen for lunch today.
walked around tm.
tm was just filled with tpjcians.
every few mins have to wave hello.
quite cool. hahas.
at least it's like somewhere you know you belong.
was talking to grace about friends in the bus.
i realise that i'm losing more friends and making them.
haiz.
what if one day i wake up and realise i don't have any more friends?
my life will just turn upside-down.
life without friends would be so painful, so pathetic.
seriously, i hope that day will never come.

2005-10-13T00:28:00.000-07:00

haha.. my personality test..
http://typelogic.com/esfj.html
http://keirsey.com/personality/sjef.html

2005-10-13T00:06:00.000-07:00

all my results are back, not fantastically well done.
as expected.
just glad that i am able to be promoted.
now, it's full swing into project work.
how interesting.
i hope can get band 1, or else, i think i'll cry.
our whole group had put in so much work and effort.
if we don't do well, i think i'll really cry.
hope that we'll get a band 1.

2005-10-12T00:05:00.001-07:00

don't regret what you've done, but regret what you have not.

2005-10-08T09:41:00.000-07:00

exams are finally over..
and i pray hard that my results would be good enough for me to be promoted.
not hoping for good grades, just grades which will take me up to jc 2.
a resolution i made was to study hard once i know i will be promoted.
i promise i will.
i'll form a mugger society and i'll be the vp. grace wants to be the president i think. hahas.
oh well.
hope i will be able to be promoted. *crosses fingers*
now that exams are over, i think it's time to tell her everything.
maybe i shall start thinking of what to write in the letter. hahas.
dunno what to update. oh well.
we say whatever we want online now anyway.
shall go.. my eyes are closing.

2005-09-19T05:47:00.000-07:00

wanted to blog two hours ago.. but had to rush out pw written report.
finally got all the photos in..
hope it turns out nice.
hope we get at least a band 2.. band 1 would look nice though. hahas.
been failing everything in the world since i entered tpjc.
haiz. don't have time to blog. still got to rush pw.
tata!!

2005-09-08T03:14:00.000-07:00

had mock exam today, chem in specific.
failed again.
seem to be faling every single exam and test.
oh well.
nothing seems to be going into the empty coconut shell attached to my neck.
nothing seems to be motivating me to study harder too.
wish stephanie was here.
she'll definitely know how to motivate me.
sheesh.
study study study!!

another addition of failure to my collection. yeahs!

2005-09-05T21:28:00.000-07:00

something went wrong with my com yesterday and my entry decided that it would automatically delete itself.
argh.
forgot what i typed yesterday too.
oh well.
sorry.

-back to mugging.

2005-09-02T06:51:00.000-07:00

i'm tired. so tired.
tired of not knowing anything during lectures and tutorials.
tired of studying just to get a stupid piece of paper.
tired of living in this world where at there so many complicated affairs.
tired of seeing people's mask everyday.
why can't everyone just be who they are?
why???

2005-08-31T20:07:00.000-07:00

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!
To all my teachers out there,
thank you for all the time and effort you have given to all your students.
especially me, who is slow in learning.
please continue to radiate your love to all your students, and continue to shower knowledge on us.
Love ya all!!

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!

2005-08-31T02:29:00.000-07:00

today's teachers' day celebration was fantastic.
everything went on so well.
thank you everyone who helped.
especially it/ava people, kim poh and all the civics reps.
one thing that was rather disturbing was that not all councillors actually participated in this event.
you guys joined council for a reason, but suddenly that reason disappeared.
so are we going to treat you like you disappeared as well?
but the thing is we can't.
once you're in this family, i doubt you can ever get out, until next year's handover.
so since you in it already, please do your part.
don't act like nothing's happening, because it is.
and don't be so self-centered.
some councillors slog their hearts out just for council.
but then, where are you?
when they stay back late at night just to put up decorations, where are you? at home, enjoying your sleep or doing hmwk, which every single councillor wished they had time for it too.
so please, do your part.
since you've chosen this path, walk that road.
don't turn back halfway, because whenever you look back, you'll fall.
and sometimes, you'll never be able to stand up again.

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!

2005-08-28T01:13:00.000-07:00

didn't actually want to blog today.
but then zu wei asked me to changed his linked at his blog, so i might as well drop an entry.
thanks to him, i'm saved.
i didn't bring back my whole bio tys file, so i have no idea what questions we need to do for bio tutorial.
i forgot to do so many things, or in fact, i just had no time to remember to do so many things.
teachers' day is on wednesday. and the rehearsals so far has just been nothing but scoldings for council.
justina's getting a lot of shit, so am i, but i think she's getting more than me.
so oh well.
i have always treated scoldings with the one ear in and one ear out attitude.
and in the first place, i don't even respect the person that has always been scolding us.
or rather, he ruin the whole respect thing in me for him.
so...
after teachers' day, he won't ever see me face again.
i hope. i pray and i wish.
time to buck up after teachers' day celebrations.
things that are still not done:
1. chemistry tutorials
2. bio essay questions
3. bio cell structure worksheet
4. physics tutorials
5. math TD 3, 4, 5 and peer tutoring
6. REVISION FOR PROMOS
7. and many other things for teachers' day celebration.

2005-08-17T02:55:00.000-07:00

was reading yesterday's papers and i realised that there was an article on the main page of the straits times about the birth rates in singapore.
singapore has like one of the worst birth rates in singapore.
and the government is trying to boost it badly.
they are trying to implement more benefits i suppose.
but the point is, what's the point of having benefits?
when a couple wants to have a baby, they would not need benefits to go with it.
they don't have children just because of the incentives and bind themsleves down for the rest of their lives just for a few hundred dollars. what's the point?
they have children because they want to be tied down, and wan to have someone to bond their relationship together.
oh well, if the government really wan to solve the problem, i think they should dig into the roots of the problem.
and the problem has nothing to do with benefits.

pardon my flare up in my entry.

it's just that i feel things should be dug deeper and don't just look at the surface of problems.
you might think that whatever you are doing is right, but you might not know actually how wrong you are.
problems don't arise in one day, and problems don't get solved in one day.
don't expect miracles, unless you can perform one yourself.
learn to move on, don't dwell on what cannot do done, or what cannot be yours.
everything in this world is fated.
if it belongs to you, it will belong to you.
no matter how much you wan to avoid it, or escape from it, it still yours.
and somehow or rather, it will return to you.
but if it's not meant to be yours, what's the point of holding on? it doesn't only inflict more pain on you, it also inflicts pain on everyone around you.
if you look around, you'll see how everyone around you actually cares and bothers.
but do you actually realise it? no you don't.
because you're in a world of your own.
you don't care about the world around you, but the world around you cares about you.
so pls, don't torture us anymore, and don't torture yourself too.
let go my dear. let him go.
*this section of my entry is dedicated to a friend whom i care a lot about, and so does grace and nadia.

2005-08-13T08:27:00.000-07:00

i'm getting nowhere with my studies.
i took like 10 mins to solve a math function question.
and another 10 to solve a chem thermochemistry question.
and i'm still failing all my tests (not that there were many).
i'm not staying off my computer like i'm suppose to.
how am i going to continue surviving in a jc.
i don't want to retain.
and i don't want to be forced to drop a subject.
promos is approaching fast. really really fast.
40 days to promos.

2005-08-12T03:43:00.000-07:00

lol. doing pw now at my dear's house.
the three guys are gossiping, just like girls.
wei tian not here yet, so desiree is very bored.
so, she is typing this very lame entry.
now they're talking about health products.
i seem to be on such a different frequency compared to them.
pw is going nowhere without wei tian.
miss her so much.
wei tian is very stress, about her installation next week.
so am i. teachers day coming also.
very busy next week.
feeling a bit depressed now. dunno why also.

living in a world or facade

2005-08-09T22:47:00.000-07:00

i don't understand why people can't be themselves.
why must they put on a mask in front of people?
why don't they want to show everybody who they are?
isn't being yourself more important than anything else?
why do they have to act so superficial in front of everybody?
it's just so hard to know whether your friends are really your friends.
you don't even know who they are if you look properly.
they can be acting, lying to you.
and you'll never know.
who's real and who's not?
we're all living in a world of facade.
why can't the world be so much simpler?

44 days to promos

reach for the sky

2005-08-09T02:11:00.000-07:00

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY!
Today's Singapore's 40th birthday.
hmm.. actually i really don't give a damn.
but this birthday is really special because it is made a public holiday.
how sweet.
i know how to dance the chorus of the theme song
'reach for the sky'. sheesh.
it's 45 days to promos.
and i'm not revising.
oh man. i have strong feeling i'll get retain.
pls God, don't make that happen.
going out with steph tomorrow again, before she leaves for indonesia.
won't be seeing her till next year.
hope my parents allow me to go to the US to see her.
i hope.
giving up an outing with my dear to go out with her.
she should be glad. haha. jk lar.

p.s. I Love you.

2005-08-07T04:15:00.000-07:00

steph came back today.
step ho and i made a mess out of picking her. again.
she landed at terminal 2 and we thought it was terminal 1.
actually it was i who thought it was terminal 1.
anyway, step ho had to entertain her taiwanese friends so only steph and i went out.
steph bought me a really nice blouse. really sweet.
anyway, we went walking around.
we ate steamboat.
steph's parents bought me lunch.
thank you auntie and uncle.
i doubt they'll read it anyway.
had a really fun day.
tomorrow is national day celebration.
after that is bio lecture on spa.
i think i'll go there and stone again.
mrs gay's lecture is just so not interesting.
after that having pw. i think it'll be fun.
we'll just most probably wreck wei tian's house. hahas.

47 days to promos.. good luck to me..

stephie coming back tomorrow!!

2005-08-05T23:55:00.000-07:00

steph is finally coming back.
tomorrow the long awaited day.
but i have no idea what time she landing in singapore.
but i think is 11 plus.
hope i'm correct.
she seems to be uncontactable these few days.
oh.
can't wait to see her.
it's been like half a year since i last saw her.
miss her so so so so much.
counting down till tomorrow: 19 hours more

2005-08-05T01:53:00.000-07:00

life these days has been pretty monotonous except for the rehearsals.
rehearsals have been totally chaotic.
i just don't understand why the system in tpjc is so messy.
they should learn from the way sac works. it's so much more simplified.
and i don't like to mention this but i think the principal is too conservative.
we are jc students, matured young adults.
but she still restricts our actions and plans.
i just don't understand when she says she wants the best for us, but then ironically, do not allow us to carry out what is planned by the students, which the other students wants.
everything's just so messy in tpjc.
all these makes me really really miss sac.
haiz.

2005-08-01T01:45:00.000-07:00

sick. i'm still sick.
missed school today.
lots of things to catch up on.
haven't finished my homework.
missed council meeting today.
and missing pe tmr.
oh well.

2005-07-28T05:51:00.000-07:00

will be missing in action for the next few days.
going for ltc camp.
with a runny nose, a terrible sore throat, two blocked ears and a splitting headache.
God bless me!

2005-07-26T05:49:00.000-07:00

was sitting in the bus today when i started thinking about stuff.
there was this big group of students from a secondary school that i think i should not name.
they actions and behaviour made me start to ponder what will happen to our next generation.
it's really a worrying sign as you see the social standards in Singapore plummeting all the way down.
every few minutes, vulgarities will just 'explode' from their mouths.
vulgarities now are like a necessity in life, like 'eat', 'sleep' and 'talk'.
imagine in 20 years time, those words may even more commonly and widely used without any consideration.
then you will wonder exactly where is the social etiquette that we are suppose to have.
is there really a need to use such words?
what does all these show others?
that we conform from the American way of living?
can we not differentiate between what is good to learn and what is not?
is there really a need to follow suit what the Americans do just because their media is portraying that this image is good and cool?
can't we just have our own Singaporean culture where everything is more acceptable in our own environment?
where people accept us for who we are and not who we are trying to be?
it's just such an irony.
we care so much about our appearance, but what actually determines how people think of us is the way we speak and act in public, and yet we're not doing anything to make sure it is portrayed in the right manner.
these scenarios are so rampant.
you can see them everywhere, in buses, train and even in schools.
my gosh.
the next generation? what will happen to them? you really wonder.

2005-07-20T03:46:00.000-07:00

my dear is so busy with their dearest project.
and he's getting so stressed over it.
oh man! wish i coiuld help. hahas. but seriously i think i will only make things much worse.
but anyway, tomorrow is their competition date liao.
so i guess it's their final day to make sure everything turns out good and nice.
i hope they win.
i really do.
not because of the money, it's just because they've put so much effort in.
school work is piling up.
so is council work.
and now it/ava work, although there is nothing much yet. hahas.
suppose to plan for the J2s farewell.
hahas.
farewell is never nice. i think i will cry. hahas.
sorry, just crapping here.
i'm just trying to relieve the stress that i have.
although it isn't much.
but you would feel slightly stress when you have no idea what all your teachers are talking about. and when you go to lectures and stare blankly at the powerpoint slides.
haiz.
i miss secondary school.
at least i understood everything.
haiz.
shall go do work now. tata!!

study study study

2005-07-16T07:35:00.000-07:00

today had parent teacher meeting, which turned out totally bad.
except the part where we stole food. (not exactly stole lar, just took)
was damn comical.
we had to consume the food secretly. and the guys were like in charge of bringing the plates and plates of food to the council room.
it was actually alvin who started everything.
then my parents came to meet the teachers.
oh man. did meet two out of six.
and two out of the remaining four adviced me to drop one subject.
how encouraging?
haiz.
shall start working hard from on onwards ba.
shall be like zhi yuan. study everyday.
but the thing is, i hardly have the motivation and the time already.
i'm not even following the study schedule that i drew up.
study study study.
that's all i can think right now.

i'm a milk chocolate

2005-07-16T06:47:00.000-07:00

You are Milk Chocolate

A total dreamer, you spend most of your time with your head in the clouds.You often think of the future, and you are always working toward your ideal life.Also nostelgic, you rarely forget a meaningful moment... even those from long ago.What Kind of Chocolate Are You? Take This Quiz :-)
Find'>http://www.yournewromance.com/">Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

GOD HELP ME!!

2005-07-14T05:25:00.000-07:00

been really busy for the past few days for today's investiture.
had to do many many things and we could only go home at 11 plus yesterday.
so i basically slept at 1 and had to wake up 5.30.
had only like 4 hours plus of sleep.
so tired.
almost slept during physics.
then grace, sharon and me went for the amath bridging course today.
didn't expect it to be so basic.
hahas.
so, grace and i crapped throughout the whole lesson. talked about irrelevant stuff.
was also msging my dar dar.
then the teacher said: "when you come for lessons, i expect your handphones to be all off."
oh well, i didn't do it on purpose. *laughs*
ok, maybe i did.
then mr lim, my first three month math teacher came in.
felt like i had to hide my face.
he was saying: " what are you doing here? in S01 got no amath background?"
hahas.
well, not all S01 people are smart. it's a stereotype.
and not all of us can remember what we learnt in sec school, so why not go for the course and practice.
but i think we'll not appear in the class anymore, cause it's really basic.
tomorrow ending school early, but i have council meeting at 2.30 again.
we just finished an event and straight away, it's another.
how tiring.
he's having his project tomorrow i think, so we won't be spending time together again. oh man.
there's just so many things to do with so little time.
i wish one day was 48 hours.

12 more weeks to promos. GOD HELP ME!!

it's the first month and yet i'm not spending it with you.

2005-07-09T08:45:00.000-07:00

went out with my god-sis today, although i told myself to stay at home and study.
was suppose to be looking for my cord shoes for council investiture, but couldn't find a nice one.
ended up with buying a bag instead.
not in the best mood today, so shall just make it sweet and short.

it's the first month and yet i'm not spending it with you.

2005-07-07T06:52:00.000-07:00

common tests results all back, was a total letdown.
told myself from monday onwards must study already, but obviously i didn't because of student council investiture.
anyway, we're going to form a nerd club and i'm going to be the president.
that gives you a clue on how badly i did ya?
but well, i'm still rather happy because rong teng did rather well.
it's true that when god gives you some stuff, he takes away others.
student council investiture is so tiring. the ex-cos are getting totally stress over it.
and the whole council has to stay back until 10 on so many days.
i understand that we need that rehearsals and all, so i'm just praying that it'll be a success on the actual day so that our hard work will pay off, expecially the ex-co.
and i won't be coming online so often already. gonna really buck up and study harder.
and in two days, it's the 1st month. hahas. happy.

2005-07-03T07:36:00.000-07:00

today was just a typical sunday. church and shopping.
bought a blouse today. hehes.
made a special prayer too, for her.
i hope everything will go back to the way it was.
friends again and everything.
just praying that tuesday will be the same old normal school day.

sorry

2005-07-02T08:13:00.000-07:00

today went out with my family to watch 'war of the worlds'
was rather nice. i would give it a 8/10.
if you ppl have time, should catch it.
you would start wondering will it really happen to us?
that's what i was wondering after coming out of the cinema.
nothing then that, didn't exactly do anything.
and today's the first time i went out shopping without buying anything.
i suddenly feel so proud of myself.
i know how to control.
hahas.
nothing else to blog liao. so shall stop here.

i'm still feeling sorry.

2005-07-01T08:11:00.000-07:00

i don't know if you will be reading this, but i hope you are.
you should know who you are.
i'm sorry, i really really am.
i know no matter how many sorrys i say i wouldn't make a difference, but i really hope you would understand.
i only got to know you four months ago, and never one minute have a regretted knowing you.
i know what i did have caused you great pain, but i hope that on the account on this friendship the pain will heal bit by bit.
i didn't want it to affect your common test, so it had to be now. i wished now never came, but i have to say it somehow.
i'm sorry, i really don't know what to say. sorry.
i know no matter what i do know is kind of useless, but please bear in mind that i still treasure that friendship that we had. really.
and i'm typing all these from the bottom of my heart. no lies.
and once again, sorry.

2005-07-01T06:21:00.000-07:00

today went to school for 45 mins for listening comprehension.
how stupid can the time table get?
imagine so many people come back for just a 45 min thingy. so stupid.
anyway, after that went to tm, but got nothing much because the shops were mostly closed.
then while we were sitting at eastlink eating, wei tian and i decided to fold straw hearts.
asked wei tian to help me pass to rt.
hope it helps to lighten his nerves. hahas.
but the thing was, the heart had a lot of ends, so we had to find a scissors.
but we couldn't, because the neoprint shop was not open.
so guess what we did?
we went to popular and tried to get a scissors to cut it, but all the scissors were wrapped.
so we had to sneak one away, and open it, and cut it.
lucky no one caught us.
haha. still remembered it was a red scissors which was $1.20.
after that i came home, washed up and went back to school for council rehearsal.
very tired now.
updating later again i think.
till then, see ya.

2005-06-30T07:06:00.000-07:00

yipee!!! today went out with rong teng. at marina square to watch movie.
caught 'a lot like love' and it was nice. he got horny where that were you know that kind of scenes.
oh well, guys. what can you expect.
had a really great time today.
realised that i was smiling the whole day.
which is a good sign. hahas.
tomorrow got listening comprehension exam, but i'm staying up to catch the results of superstar.
and he's having chinese orals tomorrow.
mine on tuesday.
oh well, i'll be praying for him.

heard from catherine that mr lee told the pm girls to close the windows to the sound room.
what the!!!
how on earth will they be able to hear anything from the hall?
and then, if there's feedback and they can't hear it, who will they blame?
the pm girls, of course.
darn.
pfa's going to callapse soon. that's what i think.
without miss wu and people who know anything about arts.
miss wu's really good, kind of miss her after a while.
at least she's better than you-know-who.
oh well, i'm not in sac any more.
shall worry more about tpjc.
but actually tpjc, you don't have to worry much, because every single thing is controlled by the om.
and you don't really have any power to anything.
that's how spoonfed the school is.
the halls tables are even moved by the school helpers.
oh well, it's a jc.

shall shut up now.
i think i typed a lot today. but, i'm just happy.
oh and i forgot to mention that i met shirlene see with her 'very good friend' at marina today. hahas.
so fated.
shall ciao now. going to do other stuff. tata!!
till the next time.

2005-06-29T07:27:00.000-07:00

COMMON TEST IS OVER!!!
happy. very very happy.
but then had council meeting straight after common test. so anti-climax right?
was expecting to go out with him. made him wait for me at tm.
i'm sorry.
oh well.
and i didn't pluck up the courage to tell nad about it. so he said he'll msg her.
oh well.
going out tomorrow. with him. hahas. dunno where we going also. aimless souls.
but then...
got council meeting tomorrow in the morning at 10.30, which i think will drag till one plus.
he'll end up waiting for me again.
and mr. reynolds will be scolding us tomorrow. so i guess my mood will be altered thanks to him.
he has nothing better to do but to scold ya?
oh well.
hope tomorrow will be a better day.

i'm going to get straight Fs for common test. feels so proud.
i would like to thank myself for the wondrous effort i made in studying for my common test.
i promise that i'll work even harder to produce better results.
and i promise i will get promoted to JC2.
thank you. thank you.
(just the usual thick-skin me)
sorry for the crap i typed.
just need a medium to destress.

well, till next time. sayonara!!

2005-06-27T21:07:00.000-07:00

today's tuesday. good and bad.
1 more paper down. math. i think i'm going to fail anyway, hope can at least get a E.
2 more papers to go.
tomorrow last two papers, then can enjoy.
hahas.
but but, the last to papers are physics and biology.
killer subjects.
i think i'm going to faint tonight, from the amount of infomation i need to store inside my brain.
and there is CSI tonight. haiz. i wanna watch tv!!
by 3.30pm tomorrow, everything is over.
another 27 hours.
still counting down.

2005-06-27T02:22:00.000-07:00

2 papers down. 3 to go.
hai. seriously can't wait for wednesday when everything is over.
well, today is the first day of school, other than the common test, it is nice.
met friends who i didn't see for a month. haha.
oh well, i'm so dead. i went in for chinese with a blank brain, the han zhi like got only one correct.
how good right?
haiz.
then i had gastric pains halfway. painful. couldn't concentrate. oh well, it's an F9 anyway.
chemistry is another F.
i had a mental block and forgot every single thing that i remembered, which is actually not very much. hahas.
tomorrow math. all the best to me.
i hate math now. i think anyway.
just can't score. hope i can tomorrow, which is highly unlikely.
shall go do math now. tata!!

'him': don't think you'll read this anyway, since i think you're bust practising your math. oh well, just wanna wish you all the best kaes? it's only another two days. then we can go out and enjoy. hahas.

2005-06-26T06:26:00.000-07:00

i'm going to have my common test in 10hours and 34mins.
to be exact.
but i'm still online.
i dunno what i'm doing.
i'm just too convinced that i'm going to faile everything.
nothing seems to get into me head anyways.
or maybe it did. but it couldn't stay.
oh well.
tmr's term 3. the busy busy term.
but at least there's school again, which means 5 days in a week in school. hahas.
shall go back to my studies now, which i find no point anyways.
tata!!

S01: all the best!! we'll do well!! (i hope) study hard, it's only 2 more days to the end of the papers. then we'll party after that. hahas.
'him': study hard kaes? but don't stress yourself. take care too!!

crap

2005-06-24T05:16:00.000-07:00

told myself to stay off the computer today.
but haha. couldn't resist.
although half the time i'm not around it.
i was studying. haha.
should be proud of it.
i was studying chemistry anyway.
and i realised that i don't know a lot of stuff.
and my common test is in 2 days. oh wow!
i'm am so prepared for it!! *hope you can sense my sacrasm*
oh well, i shall go back and mug.
although nothing actually gets written inside my brain.
come to think of it, maybe my brain's empty.

ok. my entry was just crap.
i'm just trying to relieve some stress. sorry.
bye for now. and maybe i'll come back in 5 days. *hopefully after my common test*
but i think my hands think otherwise.

'him': i'm alright now. yeah! no more cough. i hope. oh well. i'm just sick today. in my head i mean. oh maybe i always have been. argh. i'm typing crap again. sorry. take care of yourself too!

2005-06-23T05:16:00.000-07:00

shall update first, before i go and study.
well, these few days aren't filled lots of excitement anyway.
it's just me being sick and still trying to studying while my mind tells me to go and sleep.
not doing much actually, been doing math.
which i think i'm going to fail because out of every five questions, i only know one.
oh well.
just praying that i'll pull through.
it's only another week before common test is over.
i'll strive on.
and i hope he does too.
he's really stressed i think.
well, i'll be praying.
for him and the both of us.

'him': jia you. it's only a few more days. you can do it one. we shall party after common test k?and i didn't go and see a doctor. no point lar. waste money only.

still missing you.

2005-06-22T04:01:00.000-07:00

i typed an entire entry, but it was deleted, because of some error.
darn.
oh well, i was just saying that i wouldn't study until i enter woodbridge.
at least i hope i won't. but i may land in CGH though.
feeling sick now. my head's spinning. and my throat is hurting with the cough and all.
my father's trying to get me to see the doctor, but i guess i won't.
unless i get a fever. *touch wood*
oh well.
sorry for my tantrum at the last entry, my mood wasn't exactly very good.
can't wait for school to reopen, but i don't want to sit for common test.
how contridicting ya?
i shall just be prepared to fail everything.
well, better go study now.
tata!!

it's been 5 days. oh man! life is like a living hell.

thinking of you.

2005-06-21T02:35:00.000-07:00

i don't exactly see a problem with putting their names on my blog.
one: they don't read it.
two: many people knows about it already.
three: it's my blog. i choose what i want to write.

damn, it's been four days. can't see you. sad sad me.
oh well. school's going to reopen soon. haha.
but common test, haiz.
shall go sleep now. going to stay up all night to study. i hope i can.
i'm going survive. it's only one more week.
bye.

still thinking of you.

grades. flushed..

2005-06-20T05:51:00.000-07:00

i don't exactly know what to update. but oh well.
studies the whole day today, except from 1-3, where we had our meeting.
found out about pavel and janice.
oh. they're together?? big question mark.
somehow i don't think they look nice together.
oh. i shall shut up now.
meeting tomorrow again. and i'm lying to my mother that i'm going to study again.
my grades are going down the toilet bowl.
save me!!

quiz

2005-06-19T02:50:00.000-07:00

took this from jillian's blog. don't mind. :)

Ten Random Things About Me
1. I like pink.
2. I can't live without my television.
3. I love sleeping.
4. I want a iPod mini.
5. I want good grades. (who doesn't anyway?)
6. I need food to study.
7. I am getting fatter day by day.
8. I love ice-cream.
9. I play mahjong to destress.
10. I love CSI.

Nine Ways to Win My Heart
1. Just be yourself.
2. Love me the way i am.
3. Be nice, really nice.
Seriously i can't think of nine. Matters of the heart can hardly be controlled.

Eight Things I Want To Do Before I Die
1. Get married.
2. Drive.
3. Earn my own money.
4. Pass with flying colours for my 'A' levels.
5. Love someone wholeheartedly. (without having to worry about anything or anyone)
6. Make it up to all my friends.
7. Get ready a really lovely funeral.
8. Go for confession.

Seven Things That Can Annoy Me
1. My mother's nagging.
2. Doing homework (esp math).
3. Not having enough time to sleep.
4. Studying.
5. Nothing to buy when i go shopping.
6. Prespiring.
7. Blisters.

Six Things I Believe In
1. God.
2. Love.
3. Luck.
4. Friendship.
5. Fate.
6. Commitment.

Five Things I'm Afraid Of
1. Falling and not being able to get up ever again.
2. Losing him.
3. Betraying friends (which i think i will in time to come)
4. Failing my common test.
5. All insects and bugs.

Four of My Favourite Items in My Room
1. My bed.
2. My toy doggie.
3. My hamster soft toy. (haha.. )
4. My radio.

Three Things I Do Everyday
1. Sleep.
2. Eat.
3. Watch tv.

Two Things I Want to Do Right Now
1. Sleep.
2. Study. (not that i want to, but i have to.)

One Person I Want to See Right Now
1. Him

rain rain go away

2005-06-16T20:57:00.000-07:00

today is the 17th. and it happens to be the day where my class has planned a bbq.
but it's raning outside now.
so i'm praying very hard that the rain will stop.
Dear God,
pls pls let the rain stop. it's a day where 25 of us are looking forward too, so pls, don't dampen our spirits.
it's a day to enjoy before our common test, which i think many people are not prepared for.
let the sun shine.
thank you lord.

rain rain go away, come again another day.
let the sun shine in
rain rain go away, come again another day.
let the sun let the sun shine.
rain rain go away, come again another day.
(taken from Hi5, haha)

just being lame. gotta go now. still gotta study for common test.
haven't touched physics, chem and chinese.
i'm dying.

i hate myself

2005-06-15T07:12:00.000-07:00

i hate myself.
don't ask me why.
i just do.
I HATE MYSELF.

perfect world???

2005-06-14T08:14:00.000-07:00

sometimes choices are really cruel.
it's either you hurt one or another.
why is the world made like that?
can't it just be a happy world with no worries, no trouble and no problems?
damn, why can't the world be perfect?

back from camp..

2005-06-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

back from camp at last.
i missed my com so much.
and during the camp, we only had 10 mins of talk time everyday, which was kind of pathetic.
but other than that the camp was enjoyable.
the pt part was kind of tiring, however, we had much fun too.
the seniors were really nice.
i missed night walk though.
i knew that i won't be able to take it. so i told them the truth.
mr larry lim was kind of unhappy that i left and didn't return until the next morning.
but oh well, to be frank.
i rather let him be unhappy then i being unhappy.
oh well. it's over.
tomorrow going out to study with wei tian at the airport.
shall sleep early tonight.
good night.

missing you already.

2005-06-09T00:38:00.000-07:00

this whole week have been filled with make-up lessons. how sickening.
yesterday was rather fun.
actually me and my pw group wanted to go to some temple and inerview some reverends. (if i spelt that correctly)
the first temple that we went, we got lost. and we had to make an appointment first.
so, we went to the second temple.
the reverend was there, but we could not do an interview because they had to seek permission first.
so in the end, we didn't go on.
the whole group came to my house, to relive their childhood.
wanted to start on written report, but in the end, we played games. haha.
had much fun.
rong teng, zhi yuan and eric stayed for dinner. and we watched superstar together.
was practically laughing throughout the whole show.
people just really have to look in the mirror first. and also, go for a ear check.
but well, without them, i don't think there will be much entertainment.
tomorrow got LTC camp for councillors. don't feel like going though. just not in the mood.
and the worse thing is my hp won't be with me.
sad sad.
shall go now. nothing to add anyway.
tata.

camp

2005-05-31T20:22:00.000-07:00

came back from it/ava camp yesterday. so tired. only manage to sleep for about three to four hours on monday night.
came home and really scrub myself. didn't dare to stay in the toilet for long in school. you know. there might be things.
had bbq on monday night. the food was really nice, but the boys complained that there wasn't enough.
the food was very sweet though, because wan theng couldn't stop putting honey.
haha.
that's about all i think. the camp was rather enjoyable. at least we didn't have night walk.
and didn't have to call our seniors sir/mdm.
council camp will be very terrible. we will be tortured like hell.
heard that night walk is alone leh.
oh man. i won't be able to take it lor.
if i land up in Changi General Hospital must come and visit me ok?
oh. i'm praying that next friday won't come.
haiz.

2005-05-25T03:46:00.000-07:00

dun know why am i updating this when i guess no one is every reading it.
oh well, since i'm here.
i've been kind of mentally unsound these few days in school (grace and nadia would know)
it's like the last week of school. haha.
no reason why i shouldn't rejoice.
but then again, common test is coming and i'm totally not prepared for it.
it's amazing that i've been scraping through all my homework and test.
well, maybe i don't really belong to a jc.
but then again, i'm here already.
so...
i'm just crapping here. sorry.
going to watch tv now.
tata!!!

slacking as usual.

2005-05-24T05:54:00.000-07:00

i think i suck in S01.
everyone seems to be so smart and intelligent.
got back math test today, made me feel so stupid in the class.
like more than half the class had distinction. darn.
also, i feel like i have not been fulfilling my duties as the math rep.
i forgot to tell them to bring their notes for today's make up until quite late.
and like only a minority brought their notes.
haiz.
everything is bad bad and worse.
got to disappear for a while.
bye.

college day

2005-05-21T07:27:00.000-07:00

college day was a major success..
thanks to the ava crew members..
it's the first time i'm doing sound.. and there was no feedback!!!
haha.
just happy today.
:)

2005-05-20T05:37:00.000-07:00

decided to come back for a short update.
the last few days have been busy. really busy.
GP presentation on wednesday was a flop.
the computer decided to fail on my group and we had to read the whole presentation out.
halfway, the computer decided to come back on again, without a few slides. argh.
had physics spa assessment on thursday, which i screwed up.
my graph was not even six squares large.
today had the worse math test ever.
i think i'll be glad if i have 5 marks.
i think i'm starting to hate math now.
it's like a trend. people who like math when they were young don't like it when they are older. and people who don't like it when they are young tend to like it when they grow older.
well, i fall in the 1st category.
anyway, tomorrow is college day, another long day.
wanna catch up on my sleep this weekend. been real tired all week.

feeling stress.

2005-05-13T19:48:00.000-07:00

feeling stress these few days. maybe it will last for weeks.
i have so many things undone.
- GP presentation
- GPP for project work
- assessed GP essay
- math faculty test
- chem class test
- math tutorials and assignment
i can't seem to get my interest back for math. oh man.
i'm doing every tutorial except for math. how?? i think i'm just going to fail my common test.
going to spend my whole holidays studying.
which i highly doubt i will in the end.
oh well. going off to prepare for my GP presentation already.
i hope i'll be back to update real soon.
tata!!

tired

2005-05-12T03:22:00.000-07:00

feeling more and more tired these few days.
i hardly have the energy to wake up in the mornings.
school is still as hectic with all the spa assesments coming up.
and it's even more hectic with college day rehearsals. not that i mind though.
i just don't want to study.
but i don't understand anything said during lectures.
which is bad, very very bad.
because common test is coming. crap.
i think i'm going to fail everything. especially physics and maths.
i have no idea how to do anything. i'm going to fail by physics test too.
and i got back my bio test, which i passed. yay.
i going to watch tv now. and sleep soon. my eyes are closing. and so are my brains.
ok. sorry. i have no idea what i'm talking about.
hehe. good nitez.

2005-05-09T03:15:00.000-07:00

today is the 'luckiest' day of my life in tpjc so far. i think.
first thing in the morning. found out that mr. edward chew is my teacher. but actually he's quite nice.
next, we had to run four rounds. and counting that i have no mood to run, i could even run pass one round.
during the middle of the day was fine. until bio.
mrs. gay said that we didn't do well for bio test.
although i knew that i would fail, there's just a small hope in me that i'll just get a pass on the dot.
then before chem, i dropped my calculator. "OUCH!"
my bao pei. used it for three years already. my lucky calculator.
because my lucky calculator is gone, my luck also gone.
my spa trial was a failure, a sure fail failure. oh man.
the amount of pure calcium carbonate was more than the amount of impure calcium carbonate.
how great. it's like i gave birth to calcium carbonate.
haiz.
and the last thing. which happen to be the worse is i haven't studied for physics, which i don't understand at all. and i'm still onlone.
how great!!!

friday the 6th

2005-05-06T23:03:00.000-07:00

yesterday was a very very fun day because there was no lessons. haha.
we had sports day yesterday.
i wouldn't say that i liked sports day because you get hot, sticky, sweaty and oily.
it was rather messy too because most of the students just went off on their own to the canteen or somewhere else. nobody actually cared.
that made me kind of miss sports day on sac.
we have to do duties and confiscate handphone. although mean, but fun i would say.
all these made me miss sac so much.
but sac didn't have sports day this year.
anyway, back to yesterday.
had college day rehearsal after that. which kind of sucked.
we didn't do anything.
basically i just wasted my time there.
came back home after that. changed and got ready for songfest.
left home for song fest.
met many many people last night. hmmm. xueling came back together with step ho, regina, arlene and many others i suppose.
went to eat supper with nadia and bao zhu. pathetic right? thanks to some other people. shall not mention names.
came home and 'plop' on the bed. fell asleep.
my english today isn't that fantastic cos i'm half awake right night. feel like sleeping again.
BUT, i have so much homework to do. haiz.

你们要快乐--李圣杰

2005-05-03T03:20:00.000-07:00

didn't come online for the past few days.
thought my blog has something wrong just now. thank god it didn't. i wouldn't know what to do then.
everything that you see here is done by my wonderful friend stephanie, who is now in san fransico.
so envious.
well, singapore has it's advantages too, but it doesn't seem to be much.
the weather's been really hot for the past few days and it's killing me.
the time-table for common test is out. and damn it.
i have chemistry and chinese on the same day.
and physics and biology on the same day. wonderful me.
i think i'm going crazy. what if i fail every single thing? it's not fair.
why are people so smart, and why am i so stupid? argh.
well, better go and study now.

2005-04-29T02:38:00.000-07:00

today had college day rehearsal. ended earlier then expected.
but the thing is there is another rehearsal on the 6th of may. which happens to be sports day.
and also songfest.
bao zhu's going to kill me because we're suppose to have lunch as S16.
and then i have to rush home and come back to school again.
i dun wan to come to songfest in tpjc uniform.
oh well.
today is friday. thanks God.
going to church on sat instead because sunday we're going to kallang for kayaking.
just to prepare for sea sports carnival.
monday going out with my god-sister.
dunno when to find time to study and revise.
i'm not studying at all. and i don't understand anything. oh man.
and i miss 4.7. everything about 4.7. haiz.
shall go and nap now. good night.

bio test

2005-04-28T06:38:00.000-07:00

had bio test today. wrote a lot, but all crap.
wasn't even answering the question.
another test FAILED. yay.
tomorrow's friday. thank God!
but there's rehearsal tomorrow for college day.
have to stay back late again. so crappy.
but well, that's life.
i think i'm becoming a nerd. nerddy nerddy me.
can't wait for sunday.
it's church time again.
well, tata for now.
won't be updating that soon. no time.

i'm slacking too much.

2005-04-25T03:47:00.000-07:00

nowadays, i seem to be slacking a lot.
although you see me awake during lecture, my mind is somewhere else.
if not, i don't understand what the lecturer is talking and my brain just decides to switch off.
i'm doing tutorial, but i don't exactly know what i'm doing. every two questions, i don't know how to do one.
having science spa assessment soon, yet, i'm not prepared. and the thing is, i'm not scared or worried at all.
gonna have some class and faculty tests soon, yet i'm not revising. and still having the time to watch tv.
what's becoming of me??
i think i need the 4.7 environment to make me study.
i think tp is too slack. but then again, as slow as tp syllabus can go, i still don't get a thing.
imagine what will happen if i'm in another school.
oh man, i need help. i desperately need help.
it seems like i'm the only one who doesn't understand anything.
everbody in my class seems forever ready to spurt out answers for the teacher and argue with the teacher whenever she makes just a slight mistake.
i feel so stupid in S01. maybe i shouldn't have taken triple science then.
everything may turn out just fine.
maybe that step was a big mistake.
how??? everything is so wrong.

irritating people

2005-04-20T03:30:00.000-07:00

i don't really care about my relatives now. because they don't really care about me anyway.
sorry for making my blog look like some complain session, but i really can't stand some stuff and this is the best place for letting out steam.
sometimes people can be so irritating.
they think that they are always right and refuse to except people's opinions.
they talk so highly about themselves, without realising that it's actually no big deal.
they lie about things which doesn't even really bother people much, just to make themselves feel happier and smarter.
they say things which hurt people's feelings, and they don't try to mend the friendship back at all.
they think all about themselves, instead of being selfless like what friends are suppose to be.
they argue at everything you say, regardless of whether they are making sense or not.
they try to act as if they are very smart, but what they don't realise that it makes them seem arrogant.
why do people of this kind appear in this world?
i know that i'm not very perfect and i do protray this image sometimes, but isn't carrying yourself like that all the time tiring?
isn't arguing with your friends tiring?
isn't being always correct tiring?
isn't hurting people's feelings tiring?
why don't they look around and try understanding how their friends feel?
why can't they accept that they are wrong sometimes and it's good to accept people's opinion at times?
why are people like that?
why? i don't think these questions can ever be answer.

hypocrites!!

2005-04-15T06:36:00.000-07:00

having relatives can be so irritating.
sometimes, it's a miracle that i've been putting up with them for 17 years.
they just seem so intolerable.
trying to act like social elites when they obviously can't even squeeze through the back door to social status.
they are so uncouth, rude, uncilivised, crude, foul-mouth. basically, just horrendous.
i really admire my parents for putting up with them for almost twenty years.
and my grandmother. such a hypocrite.
it's a miracle that God allowed her to live to such ripe old age.
she's still in ICU, i think.
i don't really care because she doesn't really derserve it. basically, all i can say is that she isn't a good mother and a good grandmother.
argh!! why are there so much nonsense in this world???

fake. everything's so fake.

2005-04-12T05:01:00.000-07:00

i'm falling. and falling. and still falling.
it seems like i can't climb up again.
everything around me seems to be so fake.
my parents laughing and talking to each other seems fake.
my friendship with my new classmates seems fake too. we don't really like know each other well to talk personal stuff.
sometimes, i wonder if i'm fake too. towards people, towards my family.
and my grandmother is still dying, btw. (not that i really care. it seems like my relationship with her is fake too.)

fake fake me.

argh!!!

2005-04-09T23:49:00.000-07:00

couldn't help but feel lonely nowadays. it seems like ever since i left sac, i've not had someone to talk to.
steph is away in san fransico. i can't talk to her because of the stupid time lag. so whenever i'm online, she's not.
jessie is not in the same class, and i would think that she wouldn't actually understand my situation.
carlene is also not in the same class and she has her own group of friends.
so, i've no one to talk to in school.
when i come home, my parents are screaming at each other everyday.
and i so happen to not have any siblings.
so, when i come home, i have no one to talk to as well.
basically, i just feel more lonely than ever.
there seem to be no one in this entire world that i can talk and cry to.
well, there's always God, but sometimes, he just seems to far away.
and it's really hard to get answers, because sometimes he wants me to find it out for myself.
but i really don't have the strength to search for it anymore.
i'm breaking down, i really am.
and, i think my grandmother is dying.
well, that's my entry for today.
i think no one in the entire world is reading it. so it actually does not matter whether i type something or not.
but i guess it's still good to let it out.

teachers!!! cca!!!

2005-04-05T01:56:00.000-07:00

today cca listing is officially out.
i'm in student council and it/ava club. seems like a lot to juggle with a four subject combination.
finally know all my teachers. haha. and they all happen to be females.
gp is my civics teacher miss lydia tan.
mt is mdm toh, my civics tutor for first three months.
maths is miss wong and i so happen to be her rep.
chem is miss jolene lee, the pretty teacher.
physics is miss eleanor chia, the strict and rich lady.
bio is mrs. gay, nothing to say about her.
and if you would have realised, i'm putting biology last because i'm starting to dread it already.
i dunno why, but the stacks of notes are driving me and my printer crazy.
didn't feel that well today.
ate the wrong food last night and couldn't sleep for the whole night because of the ache.
today i almost feel asleep during bio lab session. not that her voice was boring, it's just that i was very tired.
chinese period was fun. mr. tan took over because mdm toh was not here.
we practically laughed throughout the whole lesson. it's been quite a long time since i could really laugh for one hour twenty mins without worrying.
he's really good. wished i had him for mt.
well, gtg already. take care. tata!!

bball match

2005-04-02T23:06:00.000-08:00

some1's bloggin for me this time and that person's praying that this blog would not be spoilt after the person's done with it. hope everyone enjoys this. (;

Love,
Desiree

went to mjc after buying books with nadia at bras basah. then took mrt to tampines. took 3 and headed to meridian jc. 3 was making rounds after rounds. finally got to mjc and saw tp actually leading the mjcian bball team 6-2. by the end of the 1st quarter, the mjcian bballers lead 9-8.before long, the game ended with a score of 84-37, mjc won. well, it was only a friendly, and for most of the players, being in J1, it was their 1st official match played. am i (the person typing this) just comforting myself? or am i (the person typing this) being logical? am i (the person typing this) in self denial because mjc has better players then tpjc? well, the game's over anyway. hopefully our players gained some experience and noted their strength n weaknesses. improve on your strengths and minimise the weakness. after all, most team related sports are about team work n cooperation. the team that makes the least mistakes wins!! well, time to go. see ya peeps.. guess who. =))

tm freak!!

2005-03-31T03:16:00.000-08:00

i've been going to tm for the past four days, to be specific, this whole week.
thank God i'm not going there tomorrow.
that is the result of studying in tm.
went out with my god-sister yesterday. actually only met up for lunch, then she had to rush to work.
on the way out of tm, her manager called and said she didn't have to go for work.
so in the end, we went to bugis.
saw a pencil box i liked, but had no money with me at that point of time. hehe.
i'm broke nowadays.
so i didn't buy in the end.
today, i went out with my god-ma and met my god-sis later.
ate mac, which is high in fats and calories.
nvm, i shall shall my diet tomorrow.
that's what i always say anyway.

Love,
Desiree

miss bitch

2005-03-26T06:03:00.000-08:00

sorry for the missing me for the past few days.
i've been busy with the orientation stuff and crap that we have to face everyday.
orientation two was bad, really bad.
everybody seemed like they are cursed to be in tpjc. all they think about is appeal.
to escape they say they appeal. to comfort themsleves, they say that they'll appeal.
what's so bad about tpjc anyway? if you bother to study hard on your own, nothing matters. not even that the school is very green. (although it matters a little to me)
well, the attitude of the students sucked during O2.
and so do the attitude of the ogls.
all they ever think about is themselves. why can't they spare i thought for the council interns? who are receiving as much shit as they are.
they say that the interns (or maybe me only) are bossing them around.
well, think about it. if we don't boss them, will they even move their butts of the floor?
they are suppose to be the examples to the student, but apparently, they are not.
i don't blame why tpjc has such weak reputation because everyone they doesn't care at all.
anyway, the teachers are also a hell of a kind.
they expect the whole orientation to run smoothly when they don't even give us time to do the stuff that are needed.
you expect us to do something halfway and leave for a lecture which we have been through before?
somethings got to go if you wan the orientation to run smoothly.
we've sacrificed so much for the orientation. it's time the teachers sacrificed too.
anyway, monday is the last day for orientation and then all these crap will be over.

banner making..

2005-03-17T02:46:00.001-08:00

today i went back to school to make orientation two banner.
the banner making was fun and exciting. i got to draw the word valor and the B of 'bruci' and i'm really proud of the B.
anyway, we ordered pizza for lunch and enjoyed ourselves.
but then back to the banner making.
somebody just totally pissed me off.
he was so irritating and troublesome. what can i say? argh.
i could tell the almost everybody there couldn't stand that person. one way or another.
hope that person doesn't stay in tpjc. *prays*

success!!

2005-03-15T20:50:00.000-08:00

ogl camp could be counted as a success i suppose.
i expected everything to turn out worse. but everything was rather alright.
most of the time we were on schedule.
but sometimes, the ogls had to wait for us.
and they were quite unhappy that had to wear white t-shirt to play the wet games.
personally, i think that if you ask someone to bring extra set of clothes, i would expect that we're playing wet games.
anyway, the games was rather fun, but there was a repetition of fill the bottle games.
hope O2 is a success too, just like ogl camp!!

Love,
Desiree

ogl camp

2005-03-12T23:31:00.000-08:00

the school holidays are finally here. although i haven't been studying much, but i felt like term 1 was really long.
i think i'm getting sick of school.
oh well.
tomorrow i have to go back to school because there is an ogl camp.
regarding the camp, i think we're very unprepared.
and tampines junior college is really troublesome.
we have to go through so many stages just to get something approved.
from the council interns to the council members themselves, then to the teacher-in-charge of council, then to the hod, then finally to the principal. what a long chain.
basically i think the teachers should give the council more freedom.
the camp is one whole day, so i think i will be very tired by the time i come back and woudl not have the time to update.
i think the ogls will be very upset that we won't be grouping them within their friends and i think there will be a lot with attitude problem just because we had to make them come back during the school holidays.
oh well, that's the way things work.
basically i don't think we'll have a successful ogl camp.
good luck to us!!

Love,
Desiree

love this!!

2005-03-11T05:22:00.000-08:00

all thanks to me dearest friend stephanie, i now have this BEAUTIFUL blog.
so i shall dedicate this entry to steph.
she's now in San Fransico, enjoying the wonderful weather and beautiful scenery.
anyway, i love her much.
don't you think the blog is just so nice, and sweet? ok.
i think i'm going overboard.
anyway, thanks steph. love ya lots!!

Love,
Desiree